Thread: Wean? Or lie?

Had my specialist appointment this morning which went ok I guess, he's written me out referrerals for my OH to go have a sperm analysis which he's just super impressed about and for further blood tests for me as the previous lot arn't completely confirming OV. He wants me to go for a CD21 test, which means I basically need to now sit around and wait for af, to then wait for CD21....

He also said that my hormone levels are in 'normal' range, and that my pcos numbers arn't as bad now compared to what they would have been considered when I was first diagnosed 9yrs ago, basically meaning my PCOS isn't as *severe* as I thought... that my prolactin levels are completely normal and in the range that they would expect OV to happen without issue.

All this means that if the next lot of blood tests confirm no ovulation they will look at perscribing metformin/clomid for me to take, but he said they won't do that while I'm still BF'ing. Not because it's not safe, it is, but because my body may not respond as well to the treatments....

So in the new year I may very well be faced with the option choice below

* Wean and start fertility treatment
* Delay TTC until P self weans
* Lie and say I've weaned, and start FT.

What would you do?

Oh no!!!! I have no idea.... My neighbour is having a similar dilemma re IVF treatment - although she was told hormones she needs to take are not safe for breast-feeding so lying isn't an option.....

I guess I would wean but then I didn't intend to do self weaning so wouldn't have had my heart set on it..... If your heart is really set on self weaning then that just isn't an option really.... Can you do more research into the drugs and see what other docs say about bf?? You may get differing opinions.

So is that some good news, hormone wise?

How close to self-weaning (or not!) do you think P is? Does he feed often now? Do you think it would affect him much if you did? I know it's different with FF but I did eventually 'wean' Leyla from daytime bottles - she was relying on them emotionally quite a lot but I was worried about the bottles so I stopped them. It was very tough for a few days but after that she just started hugging me more. She never used to ask for hugs much but now every hour or so she'll come up to me and say "Mummy, I want to hold you" and will sit and have a cuddle for a minute. So what I'm trying to say in a loooooong way is that yes it was tough but she did replace the bottle with extra affection/emotional support in other ways after that, so it might not be the end of the world to self-wean.

I second what penpen said about a second opinion, other doctors may be willing to prescribe while still BF. If not (and I kind of think they won't if it's something you're doing that would make it less effective, especially seeing as it's something that is known to affect hormones and TTC anyway), what about the possibility of paying privately, is that an option? I'm not sure how the healthcare system works with stuff like fertility but if you could pay for it yourselves without breaking the bank, you might find somebody to prescribe it easier if it's no danger to do it while BF.

If no risk, personally, I think (pre-pregnancy brain), I'd have lied and if after several months on meds I still hadn't conceived, I'd reassess. Now that I'm nursing a toddler during pregnancy, something I really unexpectedly HATE, I think I'd wean lol!

It's a tough call. I guess it comes down to your own personal morals - the drugs will do something, just not be so effective right? So presumably that makes the risk of multiples associated with chlomid less likely? Hmm... Personally, I've never had a problem lying to HCPs From what I've read and from friends and family, I'd opt for the chlomid if you have a choice. My sister conceived her first on clomid. She's been on metformin for years with no joy - her's isn't the only story like that I've heard. BUT, I've heard many success stories with metformin too... I'm rambling lol

Tough call honey - one that only you can make.

Does it feel better now though - that you've seen someone and there's a "plan of attack" so to speak? I'd imagine that must feel a little better than being stuck in limbo?

As above really. You need to know if there are any risks to P if you take the fertility treatment and carry on breastfeeding. How do you think he would cope with being weaned? on a personal level, I have been ready for Ned to wean for months but I know it would cause alot of upset and stress to him if I were to force the process and could cause more harm to him than good for me iykwim?
It really is a case of, only you can make the decision.

Just found this on kellymom.com

Although there is no direct research, there is no obvious
reason to believe that fertility treatments would harm the
breast milk. To find out the latest on how a particular
drug affects breastfeeding, turn to Thomas Hale, MD’s
Medications and Mothers’ Milk. Clinical observations
suggest that Clomid (Clomiphene) is compatible with
breastfeeding. And there is no reason to expect that
breastfeeding would affect your fertility treatment
because the drugs will control your cycle.

He's no where near self weaning. he still feeds breakfast, lunch nap and before bed, along with 2 snacks mid morning and late afternoon. and thats just what I've successfully been able to limit him down to, if he had his way, he'd be attached constantly.
If we're out all day, I can skip the mid morning and mid afternoon snacks, but it's generally one or the other will always happen.
@dotty you're right on the mark, it's really how stressful it would be for him. I hate the idea of forcing it when he's really not showing ANY signs of wanting to stop, and I'm not sure I can cope with the major tantrums that I know will result in saying no.... let alone how on earth I'd be able to get him to have a nap or calm down for bed time.

2nd opinions means more $$$, each specalist appointment is charged for and they're not cheap.

Tbh, I'm kinda inclined to lie and do what @Madmumof4 has suggested, lie and take any meds for up to 6months while still feeding and if nothing has happened still, then reasses the situation then.

If you're paying for the treatment then lie, lie, lie! No harm done as far as I can see. If it's subsidised or government funded in some way then, ethically, there might be issues there but then you and OH have no doubt paid more in taxes over the years than you've ever had back so, again, I see no problems there either.

I can't see any other reasons not to go ahead x

ahhh, I knew I could count on you ladies to make me feel justified about lying.

Originally Posted by Elle

If you're paying for the treatment then lie, lie, lie! No harm done as far as I can see. If it's subsidised or government funded in some way then, ethically, there might be issues there but then you and OH have no doubt paid more in taxes over the years than you've ever had back so, again, I see no problems there either.

I can't see any other reasons not to go ahead x

Very true!! I'd forgotten that fertility treatment isn't free in Oz like it is here... (well some of the time!)