Thread: Pacifers and other artifical supplements

Besides formula.

What do you think of all/any them?

Personally, I'm totally against the use all/any of them. Found that they intervere, with the relationship between the baby/ies and parent/s. Unless if the situation warrants for use of all/any of them.

I think the same as you to an extent, they can get in the way of you finding other ways of getting your baby to sleep or to settle which, without them, you would have to do and it's all part of learning. However, I must admit... when Molly was a week old and not sleeping in her moses basket I did wonder if it might help. I was a little clueless back then and it was before I had started staying up all night with her and sleeping in shifts with Rambo. Luckily she hated it so we never have to go through the weaning her off of it process but I can also completely empathise with those who were in the same situation and their babies did take to it.

I can only really say that we all wish we knew what we thought about things before they actually happened or knew how to deal with every possible outcome and still stick to your beliefs but for many reasons it just doesn't always pan out that way, with all the will in the world. I guess you could say that if they didn't exist, there would be no choice and no problem but for many women who must formula feed soothers are invaluable as they can't use their breasts to comfort their baby and the need to suck/suckle is very powerful for many babies.

Have you ever seen: http://www.happiestbaby.com/ - Dr. Karp taught us a lot about Molly's needs when she was tiny that led to us then progressing to a more Sears style approach.

I'm sure there will be lots of interesting responses to this.

Originally Posted by Elle

I think the same as you to an extent, they can get in the way of you finding other ways of getting your baby to sleep or to settle which, without them, you would have to do and it's all part of learning. However, I must admit... when Molly was a week old and not sleeping in her moses basket I did wonder if it might help. I was a little clueless back then and it was before I had started staying up all night with her and sleeping in shifts with Rambo. Luckily she hated it so we never have to go through the weaning her off of it process but I can also completely empathise with those who were in the same situation and their babies did take to it.

I can only really say that we all wish we knew what we thought about things before they actually happened or knew how to deal with every possible outcome and still stick to your beliefs but for many reasons it just doesn't always pan out that way, with all the will in the world. I guess you could say that if they didn't exist, there would be no choice and no problem but for many women who must formula feed soothers are invaluable as they can't use their breasts to comfort their baby and the need to suck/suckle is very powerful for many babies.

Have you ever seen: http://www.happiestbaby.com/ - Dr. Karp taught us a lot about Molly's needs when she was tiny that led to us then progressing to a more Sears style approach.

I'm sure there will be lots of interesting responses to this.

Interesting and good for you and Rambo for following Molly's insticts, spl then your own. Or others as well.

To be perfectly honest, and I'm not intending to be rude about people who don't have children giving an opinion on things like this, I really don't think you're in a position to either judge other people for using dummies or even to decide whether you will or won't use them with your own children until you do have your own children.

I didn't like the idea of dummies before I had Leyla but after three days of constant crying my mum went on a mercy mission to buy us some dummies. It calmed her down instantly. I changed my mind about dummies pretty-sharpish, having found that my enthusiasm for being 'all natural' and wholesome was impractical in the real world at that time! We stopped using them as soon as we knew her well enough to know what she was crying for, but in those first few weeks they were a life saver. They're also really handy when you do know what your child needs but can't give it straight away e.g. when you're on the bus and can't feed them. As for them interfering with the relationship between baby and parent, I think in the case of a newborn that's a bit rubbish really. For us, constant crying that we didn't know how to stop was not leading to a good relationship between us. We were frustrated and Leyla was clearly very unhappy. Pop a dummy in and she was instantly a lot happier, meaning that we could be happier and could really enjoy her and get to know her. Yes, there is the possibility that some parents will misuse a dummy and just shove a dummy in their baby's mouth whatever they're crying for, but the same can be said about all things that help with your baby - bottles, bouncy chairs, jumperoos, their favourite toy!

I think my Health Visitor gave good advice actually - she said that dummies are fine when babies are younger but that she advises to stop using them by about 5 months, before both parent and child become reliant on them. After the first couple of weeks with Leyla, I started just letting her suck my finger instead of a dummy and she gradually lost the urge to suck for comfort. She had a dummy for a few nights when her teething was really bad - again, I don't see any harm in dummies for this purpose. Teething is a traumatic time and if a dummy helps, how can it be wrong? She now doesn't have a dummy but if I thought that she wanted one I would happily have given one when she was younger.

I'm not sure what other artificial supplements there are. Do you mean things like taggy blankets or comforters that some babies like to suck?

I'm confused. I thought there was a lot of information to suggest that a dummy is actually a good thing for a young baby due to the reduction of the SIDS risk. A baby has a suck reflex - all you are doing with a dummy is giving the baby something to fulfil that reflex. Some babies suck on a blanket or their thumbsqqq or other things anyway. Pacifiers have been used for a long, long time as far as I am aware.

I have found that many of my views I had before I got pregnant have actually chanced now I am pregnant, I used to say my child would never have a dummy, and I still hope my child doesn't require one, HOWEVER, I have got one in the house ready just incase I have a baby that can only be soothed by sucking. I'd most likely only stick to dummy's at nap time & bedtime if we do have to introduce one, but I am now more open to change if thats what is needed.

I am unsure as to how you believe it can interfere with the relationship between baby & parents, surely a happy baby makes a happy parent which makes a happy relationship all round?

I never wanted to use soothers but all mine have had them. When Rhys was about a week old i was just so sore and he was using me as a dummy constantly so we got one. We only ever had 2, he lost both by the time he was 4 months and we didn't really have any problems with him weaning off. Aaron had one as he never wanted to suckle other than to breastfeed, and would try his hands in his bed, plus we still had Rhys cosleeping and didn't want him awake constantly. We hadn't had problems with Rhys so thought why not. He had his till about 7/8 months, it was a little harder but not that much. Ethan ad one as i had a lot of problems feeding and was too sore to have him constantly latched (not that he would latch most of the time). He gave it up around 5 months but there were times i wished we still had it as he got older

Noah has one again as with 4 little ones i can't be human dummy, i do try to meet his needs asap but he does need to fit with the rest of the family and a dummy helps. I first introduced itwhen i was suffering with infections when he was a about a week old. He would be very frantic about getting latched on and i used to have to psyche myself up for the pain beforehand so used the dummy to help calm him first.

Q was 11weeks old when we first let him have a dummy, BFing and comfort sucking come hand in hand and I had a few very long days breastfeeding (feeding 9 hours in 13 waking hours) i was at my wits end! It was a dummy or formula as I needed to rest.

I was so against him having a dummy I cried for the first day! I hated seeing it in his mouth.

He don't need to use it at night but i do put it in his cot so he will help himself to it if needs be. He does like it during the day though and i keep taking it off him for progressively longer periods throughout the day. He is going through a particularly bad teething patch at the mo though (got 3-4 breaking the gum at the mo - you can see the white lines on his gums) so i'm not pressuring him to have it out, he will chew his hands or pulls at his ear when he feels pain and i'll let him have is dummy.

I've since realised that it's not such a bad thing though as at least you can take away a dummy and wean them of it! Whereas my hubby was a thumbsucker til he was about 10yrs old (nothing worked to make him stop) - you can't take the thumbs away!!

I don't like the idea of using a dummy, but I don't think there is any harm in young babies having one to sleep with. I hate seeing older children running round with one in their mouth 24/7, it's just bad parenting. Freya used to suck on my little finger when she tiny, but not for long and has never had a dummy. She has never sucked her thumb or anything else, so I guess we are lucky that we haven't had to deal with it really.

We use dummies, and its been a bit of a lifesaver tbh. There was one point around 4 months when I wanted to chuck it out the window as he'd wake up for it about 5 times a night, but now he doesn't ask for it or finds it himself
I think he MAY be slowly self weaning too - he hardly has it during the day now and sometimes falls asleep without it