Thread: Is the world becoming more and more dangerous?

Thinking about poor little April Jones. I'm just wondering, is there anything wrong with a 5 year old having that kind of freedom?

Back when my mum was young it was common and they didn't hear about abductions as frequently. Is that because times are more dangerous now or can we blame the media?

Furthermore, is denying them that freedom also denying them the opportunity/ability to judge situations for themselves and learning to explore?

I don't think the parents did anything wrong. I was allowed out at 5 in the yard without a doubt! We were always told not to get in the car with anyone (even friends/relatives) unless mom and dad told us we could. April jones apparantly had got in that mark guys car with other kids many times before with no issue so she/her parents trusted him. He either snapped one day or he planned it all along. Either way, there was nothing wrong with her getting in with him as far as they knew. I bet if she had asked, her parents would let her go! I do think people are a bit more brave to be criminal these days than they used to be. Regardless of media, bad news travels. If kidnapping were a big problem in the 50's, the mums would hear about it. But they left babes in prams outside the door all the time! I would let Hunter play outside alone when he is 5 if it were safe. But our flat now has no gated in area and we live near a busy road and a burn! So if our house had a gate and was safe, i would allow partially unsupervised play in the yard at that age. Or allow him to ride his bike etc. Depending on the local landscape. But i will talk to him ALWAYS about safety. You cant watch children as constantly as you can watch toddlers/babies. I mean, people trust their 4/5 year olds be in school all day with adults you barely know! So what is so criminal about april jones parents letting her play outside?

And freedom is very important to learn. In all aspects I believe in guiding a child then letting them have as much freedom as they can handle. Tbh, it can be risky. But so is driving a car. We just arm ourselves with knowledge on safety and gradually get used to driving at first. same, i think, should apply to a child's freedom. Eventually, as teenagers, they will be off completely without us. We need to strap an L plate on them so to speak and teach them how to handle freedom safely in small doses as they grow.

I don't know, I don't think so.

When I was 5 which would have been around 92, I wasn't allowed to walk to school myself which was just around the corner and I wasn't allowed to play out on the street unsupervised and my mum was hardly over protective. It might have had to do with the area we lived in, it was in a busy part of Glasgow with lots of traffic, not a great area etc. when we moved when I was 6, I was allowed to play in the street but we moved to a cul de sac that had a big grassy area in the middle that all the children played on and very house in the cul de sac could see the grass and therefore their children, I wasn't allowed round the corner or to the shops without asking and even then I would have been around 8 and I would go straight to the shops and back. I don't know if a lot of people think they had a lot more freedom and things were safer when they were younger than they actually were. People say, "not in my day..." To loads of things. Loads of terrible things have happened to children in my life time, I don't think the frequency has picked up, it's just shocking and upsetting every time and people are outraged.

The statistics of child murder and abduction haven't actually changed much at all in the last 40 or so years from what I understand, it's just that the media plaster it everywhere now giving the impression that it's more widespread. So I don't think the world is becoming more dangerous at all, it's our perception that's the issue.

The vast majority, something like 90%, of kids are taken or abused or hurt by people they know and trust so allowing them play outside or not isn't going to make a huge amount of different to that I don't think. I don't know exactly how far April was from her house but I don't think her parents were wrong for letting her play outside.

I know things might be different in Ireland but I was absolutely allowed out on the road to play with all the local kids when I was 5. We had rules about how far up and down the road we could go and it was a quiet road in fairness. As we got older, we could go a bit further and one or other parent would stick their head out the door every now and then to make sure we were all accounted for but we had alot of freedom and I want that for Aisling too, it still happens here, it's the norm. It's one of the reasons that I had always intended on bringing Aisling home to Ireland, I want her to grow up in this environment. I don't know if it's actually safer here or what but there's always kids running around here.

What happened to April is terrible but the fact is that it gets so much media coverage because it's actually a pretty rare thing to happen. If kids were getting taken every day of the week it wouldn't hit headlines. So within reason, we have to allow our kids some reason and it will be different depending on their age, location, personality of the child etc. I agree with ILML that they're going to have freedom at some point and need to be able to deal with that responsibly so its up to us to give them a safe level of freedom for their age and keep increasing that.

I think I'm going to be saying to Aisling that she isn't to get in a car or go off with anyone at all without asking mammy or daddy first, it doesn't matter who the other person is. She's not going to be mature enough to know my sister is ok but some other person isn't and it's not fair to expect her to make that judgement. So she'll have to clear everyone by us first. Stranger danger is quite counterproductive as it creates a false sense of security with people they know who could be a danger to them and makes them think it's only strangers who they need to be wary of so I won't be teaching her that at all.

I agree with people's sentiments which surprises me as my main reaction to April's case was "she's 5!!! What were her parents thinking?!"

I'm just a bit nervous about this. Though not just because I worry about her being snatched, I guess. Maybe it's partly because I think she's so cute that I'd want to snatch her and keep her as my daughter if I saw her

Gads. I'm really going to struggle with letting go bit by bit.

As @Lu said kids over here do seem to have more freedom and it 'feels' safer. My kids from my 5 year old up play out, i do keep an eye on them but i wouldn't be outside watching them all the time. They know where they are allowed to go and that they are not allowed to go into anyones house or car etc without my say so. Around here kids as young as 3 are left out (not mine, i think thats too young) and older kids just look out for them.
At the moment everyone is a bit more cautious as there have been several incidents locally where a white van with 2/3 men in have tried to abduct children, Most kids know about this know so are also on the look out iygwim. I don't think its that the world is getting more dangerous its just that we are hearing about it more and more.
Although i rarely get the opportunity to talk/mix with my neighbours its kind of an unwritten/unspoken rule that we all look out for eacholthers kids. When we lived in London i wouldn't have dreamed of letting the kids play out.

I wouldn't allow my children to play out the front on the street, and my road is a really quite one. I also wouldn't allow dylan who is 6 to walk to school on his own and thats only round the corner. I just think its too young for a child to be out the front. imo 10 is around the age i would start to trust him out there. and i would include a "DO NOT GO ACROSS THE ROAD OR SPEAK TO ANYONE YOU DONT KNOW" rant before hand.

The idea that people think a child of 5 is able to cope with the outside world just doesn't sit well with me. I think there is an age for a child to decide for him/herself and until that child has reached double figures. i think their too young. My mom wouldnt let me out when i was younger i think she trusted me to go to school and back when i went to secondary school. my brother would be there with me tho. so i wasnt technically alone.

I dont get why the little girl didnt go and tell her parents she was going with that mark person. Where on earth was she? really that far from home? did he offer her a lift home? i just dont get it. at all.

I'm trying to remember and I was playing in the street without them watching when I was about 7 maybe. I was walking to school alone at 9 and at ten I was basically fully independent. I was frequently home alone for a few hours after school, was often playing miles from home etc. and this was long before mobiles.

What do people think of installing tracking software on children's mobiles?

I walked to school on my own (well with my sister who's a year older) from 6 or 7 if I remember right although that ended fairly quickly because we were always late - we ended up constantly stopping en route to make daisy chains

Seeing how things are from everyone in the UK really makes me happy we've come home to Ireland, people really think nothing of it. Older kids look out for younger kids, all the parents who check on the kids are checking on all of them and we knew to come straight home if anyone approached us.

When Aisling gets to a point of having a mobile I'd be very happy to install a tracker thing on it but it would seriously be in a case of emergency thing because she would generally be within sight of the house or within a minute walk. I suspect if a child was taken, the person would be savvy enough to get rid of a phone anyway. I wouldn't have it to snoop on her when she's older though and at that stage I'm sure she'd know how to turn it off!